Monday, March 17, 2014

What's the word?

Insanity. That's the word.

Nothing short of "insanity" could describe the last couple of weeks.

When we went back up to the U for Zane's follow-up appointment, we were given a "good news/bad news" report.

The good news was the incisions on his face were looking good and healing nicely. Dr K even snipped off a good portion of the super glue to clean it up a bit. Looking good, Z! (Say that to him some time…he'll reply, "Feeling good!" We can thank big bro, Bryce, for that one. Of course it will sound like, "Fweewen gud!")

The bad news was the finding of a hole inside his mouth which led the doc to…

...have a seat…

…add another week to the liquid diet. Another week isn't a big deal, you say?!? That makes a full month of drinking every meal and snack. Drinking, I tell you. That means Chris or I are jumping through blender hoops 24/7…because that's how often this dude eats. This might not seem oppressive to all you Suzie Homemakers (actually I'm not sure any of those types would even be reading this blog…but just in case), but to us mortals, it's pretty close to death row. When you find yourself making a scrambled egg smoothie, you want to claw your eyes out, chop off your fingers, and permanently plug your nose. (Wonder why my kids are so dramatic?!? Hmmmm…)

On top of the no eating thing, we remain on full-time warden duty as we attempt to restrain the prisoner. He's regained his strength and is ready to bust out of this joint. Me too, ya little felon…me too.

Adding insult to injury…no pun intended…"Bruce Lee" (again, Bryce) added a fixture to his large cranium…strapped-on glasses. Anyone care to lay bets on the success of said appendage, to date?!? Without dual ears, things get dicey. Just sayin. In order to keep the glasses up, the straps have to be as tight as possible. This tightness causes his left eyelid to stick to the lens so much so that his eye rarely can even open…and because he lives in the Land of Sweat, the glasses are in a perpetual state of fog. He's in constant pain and aggravation in his blurry little world.

INSANITY. Told ya.

Somehow in the midst of all this chaos, little man has gained a pound…which he hadn't done since we brought him home from China. I'm not sure if I mentioned that we almost had to put a feeding tube in during surgery because several doctors were concerned about him losing weight during this recovery time…weight he couldn't stand to lose. We made the call to just roll with it and insert the tube post-surgery, if needed. I'm SO grateful we didn't have to add that to his over-flowing plate of issues, but he's likely to have a meltdown when the chocolate shake machine dries up. We'll deal with that monster when the time comes.

Tomorrow is the big release date for the "no craziness" restriction. BIG relief. Then we have one more week of blender nation and an added 2 more weeks of soft diet. Since he's already sneaking popcorn and almonds, I'm counting on his maker to keep food out of that mouth-hole. If by some chance, some food got in there, and then the hole closed up, they'd have to go in and cut it open and clean it out. And we'd be starting over. For real. Yea. Cross your fingers…and your legs…and your eyes…whatever it takes.

Thanks for praying us through this insanity. We need to still have brain cells when this whole ordeal comes to an end. For now, I'm having another Dr. Pepper. It's my crazy lady medicine. Try it sometime.

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