Funny how places and smells can take you back in time like nothing else…
...also funny how in times of high stress, you go back to your old comfort foods of chipotle, peanut m&m's, and dr pepper…yea…something about teaching old dogs new tricks…so much for turning over a new leaf with my eating habits (said as I polish off the m&m's while swigging from my 2nd ddp of the day). Sigh.
As we were approaching Zane's surgery date at the U, my anxiety about the stinkin' recovery time increased exponentially. The only thing I can imagine is me physically restraining little man…by brute strength, narcotics, heavy bribery, and any other means necessary. The key word there is "ME"…the one family member he's not particularly fond of…awesome.
My next move will either seem morbid…or genius…depending on your take on the situation. If'n you'd look forward to such a period of bonding with the little dude, then you'll lean toward morbid…oh, and you're dead to me…move on. If you're thinking, "Holy nightmare, Batman," we're kindred spirits and you can read further.
Last week, I inquired about getting big Z's manhood surgery (that's all I'm gonna say so you just fill in the blanks) at the same time. I thought this would make sense because he'd already be "under"…plus it might help with the whole "no running/jumping" thing…ya feel me?!? This is what we'll call the "Ah-Ha!" moment.
Shockingly, even though we'd never seen the urologist (add that to the specialist list), they worked it out to do the combo surgery! More bang for your buck right there…or Providence, as I like to call it.
Zane and I came up to the U yesterday for a myriad of pre-op appointments. Zane missed his nap. He turned into a terrorist. I asked if they could give sedation early…or just do the manhood surgery early…throw me a bone, docs. Nothing.
How did I cope, you ask?!? I took myself…oh, and Zane…to Red Lobster. I ate mounds of biscuits, chugged barrels of iced tea, and inhaled amazingness in the form of cajun chicken linguine alfredo…you heard me. Don't judge. Then we went to get some fro-yo! Just keepin' it real, people…keepin' it real.
The only redeeming factor in that nastiness of a day was that when bedtime finally came, the spaz crashed, and crashed hard. After texting my husband about 30 times yesterday on the edge of a breakdown, relief was sweet. Yesterday, Nannie drove into town to help with the bigs…Aunt Steph drove to the U to help with Z and all-things hospital…and this morning, Daddy and most of the bigs arrived at the hotel to spend some time with the patient before the big moment.
God surely picks us up and carries us through when we can't put one more foot in front of the other…especially when you're still dealing with an injury and you find taking the simplest step too painful at times (literally and figuratively).
The bigs continue to struggle with the heartache of being back in this place, and for a reason such as this. Saying goodbye to Zane as they took him away today was exponentially harder than it should have been…and even harder than it was when we said goodbye to Zoe in the same place. We are in this together…as we cross the 3 hour mark of this waiting game. The surgery was set to take 2-3 hours so we are anticipating to get an update soon. We are so thankful for your continued prayers for Zane and for the rest of our family.
May the God of all grace, wisdom, peace, and comfort be with us all.
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